Gabriel Sedlak on Mindset, Self-Worth, and Creating Your Best Life

Welcome back to the Authority Is podcast, where we help you to grow your business, attract new opportunities, and outpace your competition. My name is George Wright III. I'm your host, and I've been partnering up with Valiant CEO Magazine to bring you the hottest entrepreneurs, thought leaders, and experts from around the world that are crushing it in business. Together, we're going to unpack strategies and tactics that they're using to become the authority in their field. And my goal is to help to inspire and motivate you to do the same. So let's get right into it. All right. Welcome back, George Wright III. And I'm excited today because we're joined by a great guest, Gabriel Sedlak. How are you doing? I'm well, sir. Thank you, George, for letting me jump on here. I am very honored. Very honored. You've done amazing work, inspired a multitude, and it's nice to be amongst them. I love it, man. You have got a lot of things going on. So we've been able to align things up. And for those of you that are first time listening, I think we're at episode 1086. So we've done a thousand episodes. If you haven't already, make sure you hit that subscribe button so you don't miss any. But the goal here is for us to help you to create your best life. And to do that, and you hear me always say, it's never too late to start living the life that you were meant to live. We've got a great guest for you today. So let me do a quick introduction so you know who he is. Gabriel's a father, husband, entrepreneur, speaker, podcaster, trainer, coach. Like he has got the gambit. He's got a book that he put out a couple years ago called Cut It Out, Getting Your Head Straight in Network Marketing. And he's an overall entrepreneur, but he's got over 30 years of experience in networking. And, you know, he's faced all kinds of stuff. We'll talk about his struggles, his setbacks, his victories, his journey. It's a total testament to perseverance and self-mastery and relentless pursuit. But we're going to talk about sort of some mental shifts. We'll talk about breaking through self-doubt and overcoming obstacles. But we're going to kind of dig into his journey a little bit. So if that's okay with you, Gabriel, we'll get right into it. Let's do it. Let's do it. Awesome. Well, just so people kind of get to know you a little bit more, let's start with a little bit of your journey and background. You know, you spent nearly 30 years in networking. Take us back a little bit to the beginning. Just what drew you into that industry? And what is it that really drives you as an entrepreneur? Like, how did you give us your backstory a little bit here? Yeah, thank you for that. Well, growing up, it's amazing how crisis can steer you. It either breaks people or it can make people, right? Yeah. And so growing up, my father was much older than my mother. Back in the early 70s, they had the big swine flu outbreak. Right. And so, um, he got the shot and I think I was three years old, two years old. And he got Guillaume Bure. My mother jumped up, ran in the living room. Hey, there he is in bed on the couch suffocating. So they came in the, the ambulance came, they traked him. And so I spent my entire life for seven years from two to nine in hospitals and nursing homes, hospitals and nursing homes. And it was, you know, suction machines and every phone call could be an emergency. And my father had, uh, what was it? 16 operations over the seven years and he was paralyzed waist down. His voice was destroyed. Couldn't talk, didn't eat normal food drawn up like this. And so my image, my, the image of the father figure, uh, the, my image of a father figure and my image of a leader was interesting. Wow. My dad in the background, um, he was, he was a world leader. He was an Auschwitz for six years, three years, solitary confinement, because he wouldn't turn in his fellows and deny all belief in Christ. Interesting. Wasn't Jewish, but he had a tremendous amount of power. Youngest member of the history of Czech parliament, book seven languages. And so I grew up with this man that changed the world, right? He evaded panzer tank divisions and rescued kids over the border. All the stories. I have boxes upstairs full of all the stuff in, in Czech. And so here's this great figure, here's this man. And as a little kid, he's like my hero, but he's laying on a hospital bed, paralyzed. So in my mind, I, as a young man process that all greatness ended in futility. So I would do something, be successful, do be at the top of my game, do something amazing, but in the background, I would create this internal self-sabotage where I would get right to the point of breakthrough. And then I would create something, not even really realizing I did it, that would cause it all to go away. And I have to start over again. And that pattern became very successful because I didn't think anything good would last. Wow. So in this kind of, my life was like this, here I am, right? I'm 18, 19 years old. Couple man figures in my life from church, things like this that would speak up. And I had this guy, a friend of mine goes, hey, come to this meeting. So the first introduction to network marketing was a lady in Atlanta, flew in on a pink jet to Peake Street, DeKalb Airport, this company called Rosemary. And we all sat in the back of Denny's. Remember where you could sit in the back of Denny's all night long and drink coffee for like 12 straight hours? Oh yeah. Yeah. We would do that. And then barley green. And then finally, right when I got 18, I jumped into AL Williams Prime America. When that company shifted right at that period of time, I got my insurance license. I was going to go for my series six and funny story but uh i had a giant head of curly hair and they used to call me buckwheat i mean uh i'm not buckwheat they used to call me cream of wheat not buckwheat and i used to drive around to 67 le mans convertible and i would leave meetings and then sometimes when people would see me they'd go this is the guy i talked to on the phone because you know i thought i was cool i wasn't yeah but um what really shifted my life is one day we're in there i'm getting my feet wet network marketing. And this man walks in with his family. His last name was Vigilante. Can you imagine having a last name Vigilante? Literally his last name is Vigilante. He walks in, he's a godly man. His wife comes in next to him. And the way that she was holding onto him, the way she was looking at him, and the way that his kids were interacting with him imprinted something me of stability I'd never seen. wow and he said hey guys something i did he said hey guys we're here we're going to go to the islands i'm here for you if you need anything and the way that they were interacting and i'm from the bucket in atlanta born in bucket raised in the suburbs and if you didn't have a mercedes at the year at the age of five years old you were a failure you know you had to live in the country yeah ibm coca-cola and back in the day six figures a year was the thing if you can make six figures a year, right? Because I'll be 54 in August. So that was a while ago. And I just, the pressures of life. And I saw this man, I toyed with network marketing, but when I saw him, I saw the fruit. And it imprinted something in me that I believe even was the beginning of my healing journey when it came to being a self-saboteur. So it all started because I saw a successful man walk in with kids, clear-eyed, wife with clear eyes, living life, free of the noise. And in Atlanta, you remember back in the day, latchkey kids was a big term. Everybody was running two jobs. They never saw their kids just to get bigger and bigger houses. And so that whole combination of those factors kind of threw me into network marketing because, final statement, I was a mercy pass through elementary school. I never went to high school and they didn't know what to do with me. So I kind of had to be an entrepreneur. I used to sell stuff door to door from the age of seven, all the way through those years, helped my mom and I survive because we lived in squalor because of the financial catastrophe that my father being sick created. And so you just become, you're either destroyed. Well, it's interesting you say that though, because on one hand, I think you've got that mindset to where you just went through a litany of challenges and obstacles and everything, but you said it in such a simple, happy way that it makes it almost sound easy for a lot of people, which we know, obviously, from those scenarios, it didn't. So I guess I'd have to ask you, what positive influences along the way growing up during all that, what did you do to kind of, and we'll jump into your journey here in a minute, but how did you, because there's a lot of people that are struggling with a lot of those kinds of things. And you came across this individual, but during that time, how did you stay consistent into a mindset of positivity? I think hating, one of the motivations was hating the alternative. And that was continuing the struggle. Number two, I never saw happy people that had the pseudo success, had the big houses because they were all strapped and giving their family's crumbs at the end of the day. But I think the biggest fortification, number one, uh, God touched my life. I cannot and will not deny that. That was the biggest moment. It literally, there's just a lot of stuff he shows you and you, and it just breaks things in your life that cannot come otherwise. Yeah. But also there were a few people, a few men that saw value in me, spoke life into me and actually cared enough to notice me and help me. And it was enough to carry me along the way. And many people don't have a person that ever speaks life to them, ever. Yeah. And what's interesting is nowadays, I think the most successful people that I've known, much like yourself, they seek out that. If you don't look, you're not going to find, but they seek out that influence. And even nowadays, it's a little bit easier to become around or be around the positivity because of the internet and some different things. But there's pros and cons there. But I think this kind of is a great segment into topics that you talk a lot about, which is the mindset of an entrepreneur and the idea that you talk about this battle between the ears and the idea that it's all going on up in here and some of the biggest mental battles and roadblocks you going to have are in your mind especially if you an entrepreneur especially if you self or self Let talk a little bit about that because you worked with a lot of people over the years. What are some of the biggest obstacles that you feel like people are facing and how do you counsel them to deal with that battle going on? Because a lot of people are battling with that battle between their ears right now. Yeah, great question. Well, the reason I had mentioned the self-sabotage in the beginning is because you have imprints in life of how far you think you can go. And so whether it's a dollar figure, a lifestyle or goals or who you think you are, many people have these internal watermarks. And unless those watermarks are broken, oftentimes that's as far as they'll ever go. Another big point is people will give to their own demise. there's many of the people watching that they would give the shirt off their back. They would serve and give and give and give. But when it comes time to them receiving or for them to do something for themselves or for them to win, many people will take, we see a lot of time with the, with the ladies that we've worked with over the years. It's a little more prevalent with the women than the men. And they are just nurturing and loving everybody. I have case in point, I have a lady, very, very successful, known her for years. And she would give Louis Vuitton handbags to people as gifts. Wow. Very successful, made a ton of money, but could not even think about doing it for herself. Now it's not about the Louis Vuitton. We know that. Yeah. But it was this self-worth like, oh, I can give it to you, but, but I cannot do it for myself. So there's some of that. So what's the ship that's needed though? What, I mean, what do people, or what, or at least what do you say to an individual like that lady or someone else that both has that problem or that obstacle keeping them from being able to be a good receiver, or maybe even it's that obstacle they have of how they see money or whatever it is. There's these blocks, these imprints you're calling them, right? Yeah. Well, it's like a tattoo and you can't wash it off. You almost have to burn it away. And the first thing is to make it known. What gets revealed gets healed. And unless it's revealed, you can't go, you don't know what's there. And all of us have blind spots. And the other thing, let's just say with self-worth, I always encourage people when it comes to, let's just say their payday. I say, all right, let's say you got a check for $200, right? Don't just save all the money and hide it. Take some of that money, of course, be faithful. So it, give it all the things you're supposed to be, be faithful with your first friends. Please, please. But, but take that money and go, you know what? I'm going to do something for me. Even if you say, Hey, I'm going to buy myself a wallet. Right? So you buy yourself a wallet. And every time you take that wallet out of your pocket, you're able to look at it and say, my labor produced this wallet. Wow. And then, you know, as you're checking at every single check, do something for yourself. Yeah. Tangible, not saving, not even benevolent. It has to be a tangible. So, and eventually you'll say, I bought this jacket for myself. I bought this new briefcase for myself. I bought this, I bought a new pair. I wanted a new pair of shoes. Every time you go in your garage eventually, and you look at the car you bought, you go, my labor produced that. And you're very, and it's not an unhealthy pride. You're proud because you didn't give up and you labored, you pressed in it, you had something. So to have the tangible, I would say, rewards of your labor that you can visually reflect upon on a regular basis and touch is paramount. But you're going to have to graduate because a lot of people can't start off unless they start off small. Keychain. Yeah, I think you made a really good point that if you're listening to this, you'll kind of really, I want to make a note and really peel back. By the way, first of all, I love what's revealed is what gets healed, right? Like I think that you have to identify, which I love what you said with blind spots, because most entrepreneurs are looking for that silver bullet. They're looking for those extra skills and talents. They don't realize you have everything inside you you need. It's the blind spots that are holding you back. So you've got to recognize those. I really love that. But the analogy you gave reminds me of something I've heard very common through a lot of the big leaders, and that is whether it's mindset or success or obstacles, you can train your mind, you can train yourself to be a receiver, to be abundant, to be positive and confident. And that's what you're saying is, you know, start to reward yourself as you're doing it. So I think if people look at it from a standpoint of you're not going to overcome it over immediately, but as you train your mind and you train your, you know, your personality even, or your philosophy on life to be able to be a receiver, I think that is going to make you an even better giver, Wouldn't you say like at the end of the day, you can't really be a great giver if you're not a good receiver, right? Well, and there's a point to that. You're right. Because when you take this and you peel it back even deeper, people say, oh, I love to give. I love to give, but I have a hard time to receive. People love to say that, right? It's a common thing. Yeah. But here's the thing. If you cannot openly receive because you're walking blind in that area and you've hardened yourself to it, because there are two sides of one thing. We think they're separate. They're not. They're two sides of one thing. Yes. then what happens is, is in our giving, we do it for value. It's actually for us. It's not for them. Yeah. You're doing it with an intent or a purpose versus unconditional. That's a great point I never thought about because people do. And I think you're right. They justify it to themselves. They say, I give all the time. I'm a great giver. But if you're not a good receiver, I think it's a good indication that there's maybe some in indirect, what do you want to call it? Like ulterior motive or whatever internally, subconsciously. So it is a good reflection because it is the same. You're right. I love that. I love that. Well, so there's all these obstacles. I think if people start to identify their blind spots, they can kind of really work on those and move forward. But what are some of the ways that you feel, and maybe in positive new activities and things they can do, people can move into a place where they can build their confidence, self-worth. And I know those two things are two totally different things, but we were talking a little bit before. I think this topic of self-worth goes straight to your ability to create success and to move forward. And I think a lot of people struggle with that as well. So, you know, breaking free from opinions of others, breaking free from, you know, you judging yourself. And I'm hitting these before we get into kind of some like entrepreneurial traits, because I think it's what holds most entrepreneurs back. What are your thoughts on that? Yeah, I think the greatest thing you can do, and this is a tough one, and it's not that you're being mean, but you have to do it because your life depends on it. And I always say this, your children do not deserve for you to be a master at compromise. Because your mastery of compromise or settling will affect their future. Because everything you do matters to everyone always. Nobody is an island. And every decision you make always affects others. So I tell people this, I say, number one, who are the five people that you hang around? It's classic stuff, but you really have to hit hard with this. Who are the voices in your life? And I'm telling you, and this is, why do you think so many people that are ultra successful, that are hiding out in a 35,000 square foot home there on Palm beach, hoard everything and can't even be around people, right? So wherever you are in the spectrum, there's all kinds of bondages and you don't have to have nothing. You could be the most, you can be the biggest slave in the biggest house, right? So I always say, who is, where do you go where you're celebrated, not where you're tolerated. You have to have voices in your life that speak life over you. And if you don't have any, then you have to remove yourself from the people. You can come back maybe down the road and after you've succeeded, they're going to say, why are you doing this? And why are you doing that? It's a crabs in a pan scenario, right? One crab always jumps out. But if you stay in that circle, they'll pull each other down till they're dead. So I think the first thing that we have to do is we have to force ourselves to be around edifying, life-giving, fruit-filled. And this is a tough one because a good tree doesn't produce bad fruit and a bad tree doesn't produce good fruit. You have to go where you're celebrated, where people are edifying, where there's life spoken over you. And that is why, part of the reason, the profession that we have chosen all these years is so powerful because the only way you succeed is by pouring into others, surrounding yourself with others that want to succeed and break barriers and also receiving from others. But I would say change your friends. Well, and that is a really big reason why I've known many, many, many people in the networking space because of the association. You get positive association, reinforcement, support, recognition, and it starts there. I like that that was your answer because a lot of times when people think about self-worth and confidence, they're just 100% in the mental game. And sometimes that mental game is the one you can't get out of. But when you surround yourself with the right people, it's like energy. And you can get this, I like to call it belief transference. Meaning when I'm hanging out with someone like you that's super successful, that's doing things, that's moving and shaking, it's just easier for me to believe in myself as well because of the confidence you exude and things like that. So I think that's really, really good to surround yourself with the right people, not just because you want to be around positive people, because it has a direct reflection on your inner game, right? Your self-worth, your confidence and things like that. Well George you know the crazy thing is is the problem isn the seed See we always are saying what wrong with us What wrong with us What wrong with us No no no The problem isn the seed The problem is the soil We got to be in proximity It goes back to the parable of the sower The seed is sown and it lands on good ground solid ground rocky ground the sun drive We know the story. If it's not in good ground, you'll never get the 30, 60, 100 fold return. So you have to put yourself in an environment where the soil is rich because your seed, great example, they have done studies. I even wrote about this. I think, I think I wrote about this in that, in that book, but, uh, I've trained on it. Nevertheless, I've trained on it, but they go out in the middle of the desert, the starkest, farthest part of the middle of the biggest desert in the world. They will go get one acre, George, one acre, and they will literally go in and put a, have you ever seen retaining walls when they're digging big ditches? They have to put the steel barriers. So the light ground doesn't fall on the guys working. Yeah. Hold it back. Yep. So they'll put just a giant wall of metal down 30, 40 feet in a square one acre spot, like a retaining wall. Inside is the sand. Outside is the sand. Nothing's different. But they irrigate the inside. And seeds and plants and things start growing out of that sand that haven't been seen or realized in a thousand years. Wow. because of what's in the sand. But again, the seed wasn't the problem. It was the environment. It was the soil. That's a great analogy. It really is. I think, yeah, that's a great analogy. I think people nowadays, because whether it's dopamine addiction or what, people are online, they're scrolling social media, all these kinds of things. They struggle so much, whether it's internal or not, they struggle with the opinions of everybody else, right? fear of criticism and judgment and things like that. What do you say to people that struggle with that? Because most of us do, right? But many, many people, I think everybody fears it, but people push through it. What do you say to somebody who just is so paralyzed by that fear of judgment and things like that? What do you tell them? Well, first of all, the fact that it affects people so profoundly proves how badly we need the opinions of people. Yes. First of all, that's a kind of a aha moment because healthy opinions, like we had talked about earlier, you have to, nobody can survive without others. Gabriel, just real quick. I want to interrupt you for a second. I love your response. Why is this? You've got such a positive outlook on things that even with something that I know I've seen, everyone's seen, even judge themselves knows that they're afraid of, you start with a positive. We do need attention. We do need support. We do need validation. So to just throw that whole thing out as a negative, I love how you start with the positive because also I think it's easier to bridge into whatever you're going to say and you're being gentler on yourself, right? It's like, don't beat yourself up for worrying about that. So I wanted to point that out because I think that's a brilliant perspective that you started with. So anyway, go ahead, keep going. Yeah. It shouts to the need, right? And then number two is you have to kind of turn off. You've heard things like, well, there are people's opinions don't cash at the bank. That sounds great. I love getting t-shirts like that and coffee mugs and bumper stickers, but how does that really empower people? So when it comes to people's opinions. First of all, we have to realize that they do matter, but you've got to find the right opinions. The other thing is you have to realize that if I, there's a quote, it's my quote, it's in the book. It's if people's opinions have the capacity to take you off course, just make sure, you know, they're paying your bills 10 years from today, something like that. Yeah. How dare, and we kind of see it again, when you, when it gets revealed, gets healed, how dare somebody's opinion about you take root into the heart. So then you have to ask yourself, why did, why was the soil of my heart available to their words? So that's a whole nother, that's a whole nother conversation. And then if their words are going to steer my life or hold me back or, or suppress me or, or cause me to walk in fear, maybe my why isn't big enough. And I don't, I don't like, I hear you need a why that makes you cry. And I, I, I hear that. Here's the thing. We cried enough tears. There's a lot of things we should do. And there's a whole lot of why's and the tears hadn't changed it. We need a why that puts us to action. So you have to say, you almost have to ask yourself, their opinion is causing me paralysis in this area. And then look over at your children. Look over at what God's called you to do. Look at the wife that trusts you, that deals with extra stress unnecessarily because you've become a master of compromise. So we have to just take it outside of that and realize the effects of it. We can't just say people's opinions don't matter to me. And then you squawk a bunch of positive affirmations. It's not enough. And this is the circle that so much of the motivation world gets lost on because they're just, I think I can, I think I can, I think I can, like the train that could, it's not enough. You have to, and I got to give you a theological for one minute. I love what the scripture says. You have to renew your mind by the washing of the water of the word. There has to be truth that renews the mind, washes the mind, renews it because the capacity of a person to change themselves, we all know is limited. Yeah. So that's a great, actually, I'm glad you added that. I'm glad you added that because I do think a lot of people that are in the space that are trying to get better are in some form of personal development. So they're, you know, they're trying to change. And a lot of times the minute they realize that, number one, they're making it about themselves. If they're worried about the opinions of others, they start to say, oh, I don't want to be that way. And so they start to go outside themselves and find clarity in what their real why is and what their reason is. and they can find some comfort in the idea that they're not on their own doing it either. But I definitely have found that the more clarity someone has in their path, the less they worry about, so clarity and focus, right, are going to be a really big benefit to you if you're worried about the opinions of others. It's just when you don't feel clear and confident in what you're doing. So I love that. It goes back to obstacles, and I love this statement. I say it a lot. Obstacles don't exist. If you love big enough, not if you're wise, but when you love something, for instance, you're having sweet tea, you're sitting by your pool, right? You've got a fenced in yard. Your children are out there playing, right? The kids go outside and they're playing in the yard and a dog down the street gets let loose. A mean one that everybody knows is not a good one runs across the back of the yards and goes after your child. Golly, I'm in my bathing suit, hot. I don't have my sandals on? Where am I going to put my drink? The fence is high. I don't know. We would never in a million years process one bit of that information. We would have that. We would do that superhero strength where you can lift a car. Suddenly the glass is down. You've scaled the fence. You've run 300 yards. You've pounded the dog. You've saved your child. You didn't even feel the bites. And see, this is what happens when you love big enough, all the noise goes away, George. And this is the stuff that has to be discovered. Because when you do that, then people's opinions, you don't even hear them. Yeah. It's an interesting analogy. It's so funny when you were saying that it made me think of, I don't think I've ever said this, but so I was, I was at one of our condos. It was like an Easter trip or something we had with the family and kids were playing in the pool and you know i'm and it's it's cold but the kids want to go get in the pool anyway you know and it's freezing cold so i'm like i feel nothing right i'm in a sweatsuit i got my watch and my phone on like i'm not at the pool i'm just there to watch them and i remembered one of our kids was hopping along testing the water because he you know didn't really swim very well and got to that point where it went from the shallow to the deep end and you just saw him go underneath the water and that's when your blinders go and all i did was just jumped in the pool grabbed and pulled him out. I didn't think, oh crap, I can take my watch off and get my shoes off. What if anybody sees me? I'm going to look like an idiot. Because when you're focused, all that other stuff goes away. And so when you talk about family and things like that, I think that's a really good point. I'll tell you. That's how you get people's opinions, not to bother you because you're dialed in to what actually matters. Yeah. Yeah. And quite honestly, if you're busy enough, you don't have time to think about the opinions of other people. That's why you got to be around people that are movers and shakers, right? Uh-oh. So it is, people that are driven. So I'll tell you this. So let's do this. Now, what are some practical steps someone can take if they feel stuck, whether they're in networking or whether they're in an entrepreneurial journey or maybe they're in a corporate job and they want to change? What are some practical steps people can take to change their trajectory? I'm working on all these things. What do you tell somebody that's like, I really want to make a change in my scenario, my situation, my life. I'm ready to make a change. What do you, what do you recommend? Well, you're, you're kind of, you're take, you're reverse engineering multiple things at once. And here's, here's what I would say. This is very practical. The first thing I ask people, I say, let me see your social media. Now, if they won't show it to me, we have an issue. I said, let me see it. Yeah. If it's sexual innuendo, stupid jokes, banter politically, nonsense, social causes, um lots of dumb jokes if they're if they're um they're the icon or their their their profile is a dog or a cat yeah you know all i just say listen to me nobody's going to take you seriously as a matter of fact you're going to repel folks so if you're looking for change the first thing you have to realize is we live in a world that goes oh hi gabriel Yeah And then they make their decision So number one the social media has got to be addressed Um and I just say listen guys you got to clean up your act That a big one The other thing, like, like for guys or girls, I always say, you know, if you're, if your profile picture is you're, you know, you're showing your bare chest or you're trying to show your abs, I'm like, give me a break. You're not trying to show your abs. You know, this, or some woman is at the bathing suit, always doing sideways shots. I'm like, give me a break. You know what you're doing. And if you're wondering why the people that are being drawn to you are not the type of people that you're looking for, there may be some reasons why, because you're throwing out that bait. And so that's a big one. All right. So that's one that people don't like to deal with, but we do that. Now, if they're married. But I like that self-assessment. If you want to make a change, you have to start by assessing where you're at, because that's going to be a change right there. Correct. Okay. Correct. Second of all, we address the, you know, the elephant in the room and that is not called the death scroll. It's called the, basically the death roll. It's the more you do this, that alligator bites and starts twisting and kills its prey. It is literally like that. So if the time is spent on Netflix, if it's spent on scrolling and comparing, because remember, we take, I think the science is when I, like I look at you, you walk in a room, I walk in a room. I say, Hey there, George, it's a 16 millisecond imprint that you make to me. It hits me. I then file it in where I think you are based upon your look, your height, your clothes, what you say, how you sound, everything. And you, you, now the 17th millisecond forward, you're either going to confirm what the file I put you in, or you're going to take yourself and put yourself into another file. Yeah. And so what we do is if we're doing constant images, we're creating these snapshots of comparison, which causes us to compare our starting point with their blue ribbon or their finish line or their perceived finish line or their super sterilized perspective. Now this is classic stuff, but people don't want to talk about it. So that's another layer to it. Another big part, as I say, if they're married, I say, I want to, I want to talk to your spouse. especially with women, I tell the guy, I said, let's see your wife. I want to meet your wife. Because when you look in the wife's eyes, I'm sorry, but a woman's eyes don't lie. And you'll know exactly what's going on in the home. And many times there's such disagreement in the home or communication and intimacy is no more than mechanical, or they're just giving all they are. They're just two business partners in agreement with children, every decision of their life in every conversation is, is half twos and bills and structure and running the kids around and protocol. There's no celebration. So I always say, how are you cultivating your spouse? I like what the scripture says again, you know, husbands love your wives as Christ loved the church. You wash her with the water of the word because God gives you a spouse to present to you. You're accountable for that spouse. You were, you were to take them and make them greater than they are when you found them and present them greater at the time. So there's all of these deep things going on. So that's a huge one because I don't care how many seminars they go to. I don't care how many motivational books they have. I don't care how much they talk themselves into it when they drive up in the driveway at night and there's contention or there's strife in the home. Yeah. It's already locked up everything in their lives and nothing can penetrate. Every moment in the house is on pins and needles. The husband's on pins and needles because the wife is doing nothing but criticizing and using her tongue to completely assault him every day. The husband is using silent control to control the wife because of, or for whatever, out of fear, because he isn't doing enough. So she's panicking. So he's making her feel bad for being upset, but it's him though. He's the one that needs to change. And then the kids are the byproduct and then they bark at the kids. So many times people are looking for the fix where it isn't to be found. And that's why where there's strife, there's every other evil work in the midst. And the home is everything. Your first order of ministry, your first order in life, your first order in everything is that wife or that husband God's given you and those precious children. Outside of that, if there isn't victory at home, you have no business preaching to anybody else. You have no business motivating anybody else. They say if you can't keep your own affairs in order, you have no business helping people with the affairs in their own life. And we think we can compartmentalize that like, well, I can just put on the hat and, and, and go, go to my motivating environment and speak truth to people. But it comes through, it comes out. There is always a transfer. Cause you know this, Jordan, when you meet somebody, you remember 8% of what they said. Yeah. But when you're driving off, you go, man, there was a deposit. Yeah. There's a deposit that gets left on you when you meet somebody. And so these are some of the easy, obvious, simple, painful, but if people really want to change their lives, they must be dealt with. And then the rest of your life, it's like you've been underwater. If you can beat a few of these things, you've ever been underwater desperately wanting more air and you finally get out of the water, you... Just amazing. It's literally like that. you're breathing for the first time and then everything else, like your want to turns on, you're able to attack life and engage in all this successful stuff because the foundation was laid right. Yeah. And I think you made a really good subtle point a little while ago where you said, you know, most people think they know where they need to make some changes, but they're not really looking in the right area. It's, you know, it's like my favorite quote, Jim Rohn says, you know, success is not to be pursued, it's to be attracted by the person you become. Sometimes we just don't look in the right area, but I will tell you it's the roots, not the fruits you've got to try to change. You've got to change that inner, that family, that internal, that mental game. So I really love that perspective. And clearly over the years, you've had a lot of success and especially working with individuals in the industry you're in. So you've been able to see the changes and stuff. I've loved this conversation, man. I wish we had more time. And I really appreciate you sharing some of those words of wisdom. Where can people find, where can people connect with you? If they want to connect with you, where's the best place for them to find you? Yeah, the best thing is social media. Just Gabriel Sedlak on Facebook. I think my YouTube channel is Gabriel Sedlak Official. I, you know, I've had all kinds of stuff on there, some motivation, some car stuff, some fun things. I'm figuring out what I want to be when I grow up on on YouTube, but yeah, it's just simple. Just, and you can DM me. That's the way to go. I love it. You know what I'll do? I'll put, I'll put your links. If you're listening to this, I'll put his links in the show notes so you can go check it out, connect with him. Like you said, DM him. This is back to this point of surround yourself with the right people. So if you can, you know, connect, make a connection, make a friendship. It doesn't even have to have a specific point of it. And I really appreciate you being here. Is there any final words of encouragement or thoughts or strategies or anything you would like to leave with our listener before we take off? Yeah, I would like to say that, you know, there's hope. You can change everything. And I'm talking to the guy that's looking for another comma with another zero. I'm also talking to the person that hasn't made their first sale. I'm also talking to the person that is at the point where there's another chapter in life because something hit them. maybe they're retiring. So wherever you are in the spectrum, God's called you to do something great. You're not supposed to just live Groundhog Day and have every day be a repeat with little successes. And at the end of the day, you're trying to, you know, you have more feel goods than feel bads. And somehow that's victory. It's not, you know, that what I like what Miles Monroe said, he said, the purpose of a thing is in the mind of the maker of a thing. And unless a thing is used in the purpose that the maker made it for abuse is inevitable. you are called to do something great. Success is your portion. You can do it. You actually can. And if you have found that you've hit this wall, hit this wall, again, wherever you are, you could be flying in private jets every day hearing this, because there are people that are that far. There's a, George, there's a great, a great photo today. It was a picture of a traffic, like cars in traffic. And on every single car, it said heading to the hospital because my, my father just got, you know, hey, we just, you know, we're trying to pay our rent. I just had news, you know, every car had something going on. And I'm just telling you folks that you can do this. I know that, that the world, you just have to be, I think the biggest thing I would leave you with is it's possible. And many people don't even realize that they, they, they think somehow they still think that it's not going to happen and that it's not possible. And I just want to tell you it has. If I can do it, you can do it. And you haven't heard one-tenth of my story. And if I can survive, I am a testimony of God's grace and that things can work out if you just love big enough. So, yeah. Yeah. And not only do I, and I love that message because not only do I believe you can create the life that you want to live, that you're meant to live, but sometimes people just need to hear that. So I'm glad you just need to hear that. Sometimes you just need to hear it. And, and, and especially hear it from somebody like Gabriel that believes it, that I believe it. So with that said, listen, um, we're out of time and I appreciate you guys being here. We got, um, we got a lot of good stuff coming up and so make sure you share the show, hit us up, look in the show notes. You'll see some different ways you can connect with us. And, and then again, let us know what you're working on. Let us know what we can do to help you and support you. That's the reason we have the mastermind and we'll look forward to talking with you more tomorrow. Have a great day.